i feel as though it's been ages since i've written anything in here. or done anything besides maple for 12 hours a day with wl and charlie for that matter. also feeling like an absolutely changed person because i'm listening to royals while typing this right now

trying my best not to let the euphoria of the idea that i never have to touch chinese again sink in, because it is highly possible that that may not be the case after my abysmal attempt earlier this week. also trying not to dwell on the latter. basically just trying to lock chinese right out of my happy bubble and throwing that ugly ass key somewhere into the pacific ocean.

i may have mentioned something about my overpowering maple fetish in some earlier post but i'm going to bring this up again because i cannot stop playing. i legitimately feel as though i am 9 and the happiest kid again and this is besides the fact that the admin have revamped it so much i barely recognise any vestige of what used to be my life lol no hate

had to pause my train of thoughts for awhile there because i had to leave for dinner. now i don't feel very well because i think somewhere right before i left i subconsciously decided to let myself get thoroughly affected and overly sensitive about existential family issues… and then after dinner i subconsciously decided to start crying a lot and i suppose that was what got me feeling slightly queasy. i'm sure i just have to allow myself to feel this way for awhile before i can resurface and before it all goes away.

ok i'm sorry i've lost all mood to talk about my life and right now i'm going to watch some of the mentalist

good bye