Met so many different kinds of people today at that place and witnessed all sorts of new rituals. Still unable to find that relentless faith and wonder everybody else seems to invest in their beliefs.
So much food for thought today but i'm too tired to rethink it all. Alot of things are coming to an end. But they have to, don't they, in order for greater things to take place. Perhaps things really aren't half as bad as they are made out to be. I feel so empty and as much as I hate to admit it, extremely insecure. It sucks because I thought I was long over this phase and I've been living life whole again. Nothing has been stable and it's so hard to keep the faith and believe that anything will work out for me. Not even family. It's no longer that typical matter of pushing people away. I feel as though I've been locked up since I was 9 and somebody stole my keys and lost them.
I want to experience everything; feel every emotion there is to be felt in this world, from the worst loss to the greatest happiness. Only then will I feel complete and I believe I'll find myself.
Putting all that shit aside right now I just want to go home so that I can cry rather than feel like a fucking watched animal

Ps. Sliced two fingers and half a nail cos pumpkins